By EJ Afzelius
No game is perfect. Ok, scratch that. Nothing is perfect. There are however, a few things that mildly glimpse perfection, like through a peephole, but glimpse nonetheless. Things like Michaelangelo’s David, the Eiffel Tower, Junior’s cheesecake, and true love, ‘cause yes I believe in it, and yes I was brainwashed by Hallmark.
For video games though? Now don’t kill me or anything, but maybe Super Mario Bros., Fallout, and Castlevania: Symphony of the Night walk along those extremely narrow lines. Yes, stop screaming at me, I know there are more, but these three are the ones that quickly broke out of my skull. Let’s leave the lists for next time though. 
What I’m trying to get at here is, it’s possible. No game may be perfect, but some come scary close. So if a game takes 6 years to finish, it’s not wholly unexpected to believe it should walk along this tight rope too. Well, unexpect it, especially if you’ve been desperately waiting for one game in particular – Gran Turismo 5.
It was supposed to be the 2nd coming, the herald of a bright future for racing game fans. Instead? Gran Turismo 5 hooves like a vacuum, parts of it anyway. Let me get this straight, the parts it gets right are actually quite impeccable. That’s a lot of parts, most of the game even. GT5 is still the king of racing sims. So why the hate?
We expected too much. All the hype, the marketing, and that damn oversized demo turned the anticipation inside our fragile hearts into a pressure cooker. Well, the cooker just exploded. Out of 1000 cars, only 200 look like heaven. The rest? Oh, they were merely imported from GT4 and dusted off. The purported per panel damage physics are also sub par, paling in comparison to awesome disasters in games like Burnout Paradise and Hot Pursuit. There are other distressing features, but my point is, after six years of build up, Gran Turismo 5 couldn’t possibly pass through critics unscathed. The tiniest mistake is suddenly seen as sacrilege, an affront to the Almighty Himself. If it took less time for The Burj Dubai to reach “tallest building in the world” status, then GT5 should be a complete masterpiece. Instead, it’s merely a partial success. Unacceptable!
Polyphony Digital, developer of the Gran Turismo series, can pick up a few tips from the social/casual game arena. Plants vs. Zombies was practically unheard of until it was, well, heard of. Angry Birds? Same thing, the bird tossing fun gameplay speaks for itself. Don’t even get me started on Farmville, we all scoffed at the notion. But now, the virtual lands have never looked greener. We’re even seeing spinoffs like FrontierVille and CityVille! There wasn’t any ridiculous hype behind these casual titles. Their gameplay did the talking.
I’m not saying casual games are better because their not overly hyped. But you have to admit, we’re getting zero expectations, and infinite fulfillment (depending on how long the game lasts for you). The big gaming studios however, are falling on a habit of big ambitions accompanied by even bigger boasting. I’m talking to you Lionhead. Peter Molyneux has bragged time and again about how awesome his upcoming titles will be, and it’s backfired harder and harder each time. His latest, Fable 3, was skewered by fans and critics alike, and it’s not even a horrible game. So developers, here’s a lesson for you: Shut your trap and deliver! Or else, you end up like Gran Turismo 5, roasted like a turkey just in time for the holidays. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
[Tukkolabs]
Big Titles, Bigger Mouths, even Bigger Pressure
By EJ Afzelius
No game is perfect. Ok, scratch that. Nothing is perfect. There are however, a few things that mildly glimpse perfection, like through a peephole, but glimpse nonetheless. Things like Michaelangelo’s David, the Eiffel Tower, Junior’s cheesecake, and true love, ‘cause yes I believe in it, and yes I was brainwashed by Hallmark.
For video games though? Now don’t kill me or anything, but maybe Super Mario Bros., Fallout, and Castlevania: Symphony of the Night walk along those extremely narrow lines. Yes, stop screaming at me, I know there are more, but these three are the ones that quickly broke out of my skull. Let’s leave the lists for next time though.
What I’m trying to get at here is, it’s possible. No game may be perfect, but some come scary close. So if a game takes 6 years to finish, it’s not wholly unexpected to believe it should walk along this tight rope too. Well, unexpect it, especially if you’ve been desperately waiting for one game in particular – Gran Turismo 5.
It was supposed to be the 2nd coming, the herald of a bright future for racing game fans. Instead? Gran Turismo 5 hooves like a vacuum, parts of it anyway. Let me get this straight, the parts it gets right are actually quite impeccable. That’s a lot of parts, most of the game even. GT5 is still the king of racing sims. So why the hate?
We expected too much. All the hype, the marketing, and that damn oversized demo turned the anticipation inside our fragile hearts into a pressure cooker. Well, the cooker just exploded. Out of 1000 cars, only 200 look like heaven. The rest? Oh, they were merely imported from GT4 and dusted off. The purported per panel damage physics are also sub par, paling in comparison to awesome disasters in games like Burnout Paradise and Hot Pursuit. There are other distressing features, but my point is, after six years of build up, Gran Turismo 5 couldn’t possibly pass through critics unscathed. The tiniest mistake is suddenly seen as sacrilege, an affront to the Almighty Himself. If it took less time for The Burj Dubai to reach “tallest building in the world” status, then GT5 should be a complete masterpiece. Instead, it’s merely a partial success. Unacceptable!
I’m not saying casual games are better because their not overly hyped. But you have to admit, we’re getting zero expectations, and infinite fulfillment (depending on how long the game lasts for you). The big gaming studios however, are falling on a habit of big ambitions accompanied by even bigger boasting. I’m talking to you Lionhead. Peter Molyneux has bragged time and again about how awesome his upcoming titles will be, and it’s backfired harder and harder each time. His latest, Fable 3, was skewered by fans and critics alike, and it’s not even a horrible game. So developers, here’s a lesson for you: Shut your trap and deliver! Or else, you end up like Gran Turismo 5, roasted like a turkey just in time for the holidays. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
[Tukkolabs]